Finding calm amidst the chaos
Calming down, not overthinking and finding magic
The sun isn’t up the horizon yet, but the sky is illuminated with the colours of dawn as I write this. The gentle morning breeze blows, the air is a little cold reminding me that autumn is here. I love this sense of calm that the morning brings. Most mornings are usually rushed for me, but today I just take it slowly. I need the sun to be up a little for my walk. And I don’t want work to take over these few minutes of calm early in the day, so I sit down and write. I write because I haven’t in a really long time and there is an urge to just write. Because it just feels right.
The last few days seem to have gone by in a blur. Like Taylor Swift says, “August slipped away into a moment in time”. I was looking forward to an August with more time for the things that I enjoy doing because I had less of my usual stuff as it was vacation time here. But then work seemed to take over all of the free time that I had including weekends. I did have a short trip in August and I also went to a concert, but with things being so busy before and after the trip and concert, it all seemed rushed, it all seemed overwhelming. And I have been in that state for quite some time now.
Writing was the first to take a backseat. My original plan was to write a poem every day of August. But let alone writing a poem, I couldn’t keep up with writing here on Substack once a week. Music also took a backseat and so did the many little things that I had planned for the month. But something had to change - I couldn’t go on this way.
It started with giving myself just 10 minutes to read and not go into a state of overwhelm with everything. I have been guilty of multitasking often - it is a necessary evil sometimes. So it is difficult for me to just do one thing but then with multitasking, I also found myself jumping from one thought to the next and then being in a constant state of overwhelm.
After a long day at work, I just sat down with a book in my balcony, my phone on airplane mode and the glow of the golden hour. It worked. And so I tried adding other things to do- a different thing for everyday of the week. 10 minutes of playing an instrument, one episode of watching something without looking at my phone or doing something in parallel. It helped. Some days it was difficult to push myself to do something by being actively present and not let my mind wander. But I persisted. I scribbled a verse one day, recorded a cover of a song that I liked to sing when I was younger, tried a new sport and ever so slowly I started calming down.
I had let work take over the rest of my life as well. It was difficult to switch off when there were so many things to do at work, so many problems to be solved without knowing what to do. It is difficult to separate out the different aspects of life because often they do blend it. But it necessary to stop overthinking and focus on the moment. There will always be a lot of things to do, but just thinking about it always just makes it more stressful. The troubles of the past and the worries of the future will always be there, but the present is what we have.
Long walks in nature, books, good food and music have been my way of dealing with stress. Of late I have been reading more books with fantasy and magical realism. These books remind me that there is magic in everything, sometimes it is about looking at things and appreciating the little joys. There is no book review with this edition of the newsletter, but I hope to put one up soon. I am currently reading “The Garden of Memories” by Amanda James. It is a heart warming book about a garden bringing joy and purpose in peoples lives. I am almost half way into the book and I like the message that it has. I am also hosting a buddy read of the book “Emily Wilde’s Map of the Otherlands” by Heather Fawcett. The book is 2nd in the series and the chapters are journal entries by Emily. The first chapter in the book was dated 14th September and I decided to read the chapter on the date that is mentioned for the complete book. If it sounds like fun and you would like to join in, let me know. There is plenty of time to catch up.
I am also listening to “The Measure” by Nikki Erlick as an audiobook. This book is set in a world where all the people in the world find boxes with strings in them and the string indicates the length or the measure of your life. So how does the world change when people know how long they are going to live? Some thing to ponder on I think. The song “Que Sera Sera” makes an appearance a few times in this book . And perhaps that is the message that I want to leave you with today - Whatever will be, will be.
And I hope to write here more often!
How do you manage to separate work from the rest of your life? Are you able to stop thinking about work when the workday is over?
"The troubles of the past and the worries of the future will always be there, but the present is what we have." Beautifully written 🤗 so true. It's a good reminder today (as well). I hate that I reached the point where I can't even sit down and eat in peace, without checking my phone or looking at some videos. I feel like I just need the distractions and the dopamine rush coming from social media. So annoying. "The Measure" sounds really interesting, it's about a thought I have often played with as well :) I think I'll finally subscribe to audiobooks or something so that I can also listen to it :)